Tuesday, September 29, 2009

arranged marriage vs love marriage

In some countries, marriages are arranged by the parents but in other cases, people choose their own marriage partner.

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

When this topic arises, a lot of questions arise in my mind. If I am the one who is now going to decide which type of marriage that I am going to choose, I really can’t answer it as there are too many areas to be discussed. So I just choose to discuss some areas of it.
So the best way to start discussing this topic is to know what are the meaning of arrange marriage and choosing their own marriage partner.
What is mean by arranged marriage? Arrange marriage (also known as pragmatic marriage) is a marriage that basically arrange by the parents of the groom or bride in the selection of their future spouses. However, both sides of the parents are given full consent in the marriage. This kind of marriage started since the moment people know about the marriage. It has been still exist in some country, especially poor countries like India, China, North Korea and so on. Some of these parents, they use marriage to improve their family condition and status. What does this mean? This means that the family will choose to “sell “their daughter to the rich man as the 2nd or 3rd wife. This seen to be totally immoral and inhumanities. The children have no right to choose their future soul mates. So basically in this situation, there is no such thing called ‘love’ between them. Will this kind of marriage last longer? It depends. If both sides can tolerate with each other, the marriage will last.
Arrange marriage seen to be inhumanities when the marriage is not arrange by the lovers themselves. However, it comes with a good aim when the children reach a certain age and don’t have their lovers, the parents will start worried. The chances of getting married decreases as the age increase. So the parents will start to help their children to find the suitable one. They will arrange lunch, activities for the children to know each other better and to see whether they have feeling towards each other or not. Sometime this kind of marriage works as their children are shy person or don’t have experience in love before. I believe that the parents will pick and choose carefully to find the best one for their children.
Nowadays, the people seem to like freedom so much and they wish to decide everything by themselves including their marriage. They want to choose their life partner by their own. It sounds great as they have the right to choose. They have some sort of love feeling towards each other and they prepare to get into marriage. However, this doesn’t ensure 100%successful marriage. Some of them may end up their marriage a few years after they have discovered that they are not made for each other. Sometime love is blind. The people in love will find everything fine and good in their partners. But sometime the people from the other view can see more clearly and sometime the people can find the problems between the loves. Therefore love is a hard and tough issue and can’t explain in any means.
Some of the people they don’t even know what are love in their whole life. Just before they died, they find out that the marriage is just a responsibility to honor their parents and continue the generation and not love. This exist not only in arrange marriage but also the lovers who choose their own partners. Some of the lovers choose their partners not because of love but a person that they can rely on for the whole life and that’s it.

As a conclusion, marriage is the blessing from God and the marriage should build with a strong foundation of truly trust between the couple. And the marriage is the whole life learning process from life partner. So no matter which type of marriage you want to choose, I just want to bless that it will end up with a fruitful way.

reference:
1.http://marriage.about.com/cs/legalities/g/arranged.htm
2.http://ezinearticles.com/?The-Reality-of-Arranged-Marriages&id=606
3.http://www.teachingpages.co.uk/topicPresentation/articleMarriagePart1
4.thttp://www.boloji.com/women/0072.htm
5.http://www.littleindia.com/news/145/ARTICLE/1797/2007-06-02.html

No comments:

Post a Comment